Monday, 5 March 2012

Growing up.

I have often been told that I look much older than I am. Sometimes people don't believe me when I tell them how old I actually am. Just today, some guy told me that I looked at least 20.

More than once, someone out of my ideal dating age range has hit on me. I will admit that it is flattering, but I would much prefer it if they were my age or just slightly older, not early 20s and rather seedy looking. When I sense that someone is hitting on me and they fit the latter description, I actually say to them that I am only 16 and the look on their face is priceless! It is a mixture of disbelief and WTF. Oh, how I love tripping people out! It happened a fair bit when I went Europe in 2009. When we went out, more often than not the waiter would set a wine glass in front of me. I would never say anything as I thought they weren't actually being serious, but when they started pouring the wine, I had to kindly let them know that I was in fact, only 14.

Sure, I do look older than my actual age, which is sixteen, but I only look it. I don't necessarily act it. While I do have more maturity than most people my age, I still love doing crazy and stupid things. I love being childish too.

I still love to run around in the rain.
I still laugh until I cry.
I still occasionally act like an idiot.
I still talk way too loudly in public.
I still act completely irrational.
I still occasionally cry when I don't get my way, but not as often as I did when I was 3.
I still get over excited about small things.
I still love to roll down grassy hills.
And I still love jumping castles.

These are things I may never grow out of. And I couldn't care less. What is life without having fun and taking risks? I may as well screw up now, while I'm young and it isn't too much of a big deal.

Growing up doesn't necessarily freak me out, what freaks me out is the fact that I could potentially lose my identity in the process. I don't want to be perfect, and I certainly won't conform to someone else's ideas of perfection either. In the meantime, I'm still going to act like a little kid while I can.

You only live once and I'm going to live my life for me, and no one else.

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